


Broken promises

by fangirl2013



Series: The White Queen Tumblr Prompts [13]
Category: The White Queen (TV)
Genre: Angst, Betrayal, F/M, Music prompt, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2015-06-27
Packaged: 2018-04-06 12:13:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4221315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirl2013/pseuds/fangirl2013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"There's just some things that I can't explain like the reason why I make you feel this way<br/>I keep on saying that I am going to change now how could you believe a word I say </p><p>I wish there was some way to see I never meant to make you cry<br/>If I could take back just one thing I swear that I'd take back that night </p><p>Everything I loved was gone the morning the morning after<br/>I wish I never woke up on the morning the morning after "- Makeshift Romeo "The morning after"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Broken promises

**Author's Note:**

> I hope this is alright

It was always going to be difficult. He had always known that. He didn't know, however, just how hard it would be. Far too easily for his liking, he had succumbed to temptation and in the process broken his promise to the woman he supposedly loved. It didn't seem such a big deal to him at the time. After all, it was just a meaningless one night stand. It was a rather regular occurrence. It always had been. Women and even men always seemed to be drawn to him and of course, Edward used it to his advantage. His desire for attention, adoration and sex would always override his loyalty to Anne. It always did...

Many mornings, he would wake up naked and confused next to a stranger he barely knew. Apart of him would always feel guilty yet it had never once stopped him from repeating his sordid actions. His promise to change had resulted from him being finally caught out. He'd felt desperate, unhappy and as usual, he'd promised immediately to change his wayward ways. Of course, Anne had believed him but he soon realised just how hard it was for her. Despite never catching him before, the effects of his cheating was clear to see. Her self-doubt, insecurities and hurt was clear to see and he had to hope she wouldn't always feel the effects of his behaviour.

A sigh escaped him as he thought of her. Being with her had been easy. She gave him the comfort, security and happiness he needed and as a result, he had loved her from the moment they'd first talked. Before too long, he'd become accustomed to her being there as if she was a constant in his life. Although, the feeling made him happy, he'd needed excitement. That excitement had ended up taking the form of Jane's bed. The ache that formed deep within in his empty chest whenever he thought of Anne intensified as he thought and before too long it felt almost unbearable.

"Mhm. Edward...." The woman next to him mumbled, her voice muffled with sleepiness. His weary gaze flickered to the sleeping figure beside him yet he knew he felt nothing for her. His heart didn't thud excitedly at the sight of her and no matter how much she hugged him, he never felt as protected and loved as he had done with Anne. Jane's long flowing blonde hair covered her pillow completely and for a few lonely moments, his eyes followed the length of them. Anything to keep his mind away from the aching feeling inside of him. 

Apart of him wondered what she was dreaming about, especially, given the stricken expression on her face. As she began to cry out for him, he knew he would have to comfort him. More out of duty than any real desire to. He should have felt bad at the realisation yet instead he felt numb. From the moment Anne had stomped out of his life, taking his heart with her, he had no longer felt alive. A wry laugh forced its way out of his mouth at the thought, despite him feeling anything but humorous. He had cheated on Anne (and broken his promise) to feel alive in the first place. The irony of it all didn't escape him!

"No. No. No. No!" Her voice raised as she became even more agitated. Edward felt almost helpless looking at her. If it had been Anne, he would have known what to do. The desire to comfort her would have been too strong and far too compelling to ignore. Looking at Jane, however, that desire was not there. He watched tiredly as her eyes opened moments later.

It was then he spotted that her cheeks were wet from her tears. The sight didn't evoke any sense of guilt or pity for her and he knew why. He would have needed to respect her for that. Even that realisation had no effect on him. After all, sleeping with Jane had lost him his Anne and he couldn't help but want to hate her for it. The feeling overwhelmed everything he felt for her and it stopped him feeling anything near affection. He couldn't quite manage hatred, though. It would mean feeling something other than numbness. 

"What's wrong?" The question sprung from his lips quickly, his curiosity about her dream making him ask. He sounded tired, exhausted even rather than concerned but he didn't worry about Jane noticing. She never did. Perhaps, she liked him as much as he liked her. It certainly wouldn't have come as a surprise to him.

She blinked the sleep away from her eyes quickly and it seemed momentarily, she was at a loss for words. She sat, staring at him wordlessly. Her gaze seemed cold and almost unnerving so much so that Edward felt the need to break the silence. Anything to distract her from staring at him quite so intensely. Finally, after he eventually forced a smile on his face, she started speaking to him. 

"I dreamt you left me. You decided you had no need of me." Much to his surprise, Jane sounded deeply upset. Tears filled her pale, tired eyes quickly at her words and he once again had no idea what to do.

Comforting her seemed the logical and caring thing to do yet he didn't have the desire. He quickly took her in his arms and brought her into a tight embrace. It felt odd and almost wrong holding someone other than Anne in such an intimate way. The thought made him want to laugh once more. After all, he had done lots of 'intimate' things with lots of other people! He quelled the desire and began to rub Jane's back softly. He could hear and feel the shakiness of her breath and how she calmed down at his touch. It made him feel almost powerful. It seemed ludicrous that the simplest of touches could create such a reaction. 

"Tell me it'll never happen. Please?" Her voice was small and raw with emotion. She seemed almost fragile. It was so unlike her usual self-assured, confident attitude. It was one of the main reasons he had been attracted to her in the first place. She'd seemed so vibrant and lively.

He knew what he should tell her. What was the right thing to say. The words wouldn't come to him, however. He felt weary, tired and so very sick of lying. The reassurance she so desperately needed and wanted to hear would be a lie. A lie, that for once, his conscience couldn't and wouldn't countenance.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment?


End file.
